I am on the bus on the way to Harvey Nichols to have my hair mended at Daniel Hersheson when Abigail rings my mobile. from Dorset
‘Hi Mum.’ she says ‘We’re fine,’ she says ‘but it’s pouring with rain. We have to spend most of our time in The Pub. We ordered a Jug of Pimms yesterday and do you know what?’
‘What.’ I say.
‘No one had ever ordered a Jug of Pimms there before. Me and Posy had to tell them how to mix it. We had to tell them about putting mint and apples in it and everything. Now when we go into The Pub, they call us “The Pimms Girls.”
‘Oh,’ I say ‘Are you and Posy eating anything apart from Pimms?’ The woman sitting next on me on the bus gives me a funny look.
‘I mean are you eating as well as drinking?’ I ask Abigail.
‘Yes, yes of course.’ says Abigail. ‘And the television in the cottage doesn’t work so we’re reading a lot too. Posy is reading Kafka and I’m reading Camus. How about that for educated?’ says Abigail.
‘Camus?’ I say ‘Who is Camus. I’ve heard of Kafka, obviously, but I’ve never heard of Camus.’ The woman next to me on the bus flinches, visibly.
‘Mum!’ says Abigail ‘Albert Camus!’ she says, complete with exclaimation marks. ‘You must have heard of him.’
I hear Posy say something in the background.
‘No, I don’t think she is joking.’ says Abigail to Posy.
Later, I arrive at Daniel Hersheson.
‘Who did this to your hair?’ asks my stylist, Amy.
I tell Amy who did it.
‘Oh.’ she says ‘I used to work there. They’ve gone bankrupt now. ‘
‘I expect someone sued them.’ I say.
‘Yes.’ says Amy examining my hair. ‘I expect they did.’
‘Amy.’ I say ‘Have you ever heard of Albert Camus?’
‘Yes, of course.’ says Amy ‘ He won the Nobel prize in 1957. He was French Algerian Existentialist, wasn’t he?’
‘I pick up a copy of ‘Hello’ magazine from a stack next to my chair.
‘Oh look.’ I say ‘Aren’t Brad and Angelina’s babies sweet?’
‘Mmmm.’ says Amy.
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